Judge Kiboshes "Secession" Defense; Rejects Native American Property Owner's Attempt To Form His Own Indian Reservation To Dodge City "Fix-Up" Order

Attorney/columnist John G. Browning writes in The Southeast Texas Record:

• Sometimes, I get the feeling that judges are placed in the position of being like a game show host dealing with a particularly dense contestant giving an incorrect answer - "No, so sorry, but thanks for playing and we have some lovely parting gifts for you." When litigants come up with some of the most bizarre theories and defenses imaginable, some judges have to wonder, "Did you really think I was going to buy that?"

• Take William Bowersock, for example. The Lima, Ohio, man was facing violations of the city's nuisance laws for two run-down houses he owns, and which the Lima property authorities had ordered him to clean up and repair. Bowersock's defense was to contend that he had seceded from the city and, by virtue of his Native American ancestry, had formed his own Indian reservation - making him exempt from the city's property code.

• But Judge Richard Warren said not so fast, Cochise; he rejected the whole "I am my own reservation" argument and ordered Bowersock to fix up the two homes. It just goes to show you - no man is an island, and no man is an Indian reservation either.

For other bizarre legal theories and defenses from litigants in lawsuits, see "Nice Try, But ... No."